Thursday, March 09, 2006

What I've learned this week...

This has been a long ass week! I've actually learned a few things about myself along the way though, so I guess it was a productive one.

Here are a few of the things that I've learned.

1. While I am a woman that's very happy working in an almost all male environment, there are still days that I wish avidly for a penis. Yep, you read that right, a penis. Apparently having a penis helps a person to feel confident when doing things like buying rope and tying mattresses to the roof of a Jeep. I mean, I'm intelligent, I'm educated, I'm perfectly capable of handling myself in almost any situation, and yet it took me over 2 hours to decide what type of rope I needed and what the best way was to ensure that my new mattresses wouldn't go flying down the highway (which is what happened last time). I must have spent 30 minutes trying to determine which mathematical equation I needed to figure out how many pounds of pressure the rope had to be able to withstand, factoring in the weight of the mattresses and my speed (I'm pretty sure that if you have a penis you don't think about things like that). I could be wrong though.

So who knew? Penis' actually have multiple uses!

2. I'm destined to get kicked out of the girl club. Trying to sit around and have a conversation with a bunch of women over brunch is now my new definition of hell. I'm sure that all women aren't like this, but honestly, I really don't care how old little Johnny was when he started to walk. No, I didn't realize that your designer bag was the "seasons" biggest thing, and nope, I don't care. Personally, I think you must not be all that bright if you intentionally spent close to $400 on an ugly bag that you'll be afraid to be seen with in 6 months. I'm just sayin'...

3. Being told by my son that I'm "the coolest mom ever" and having him voluntarily give me a hug in public will make my day. Each and every time.

4. While spending over 5 hours on the phone with an old friend may have seemed like fun at the time, in actuality it left me feeling like I had been run over by a steamroller for the following two days. Also, it was pointless because I was left so tired that I can't remember anything about what was said.

5. I will never, ever, ever be completely caught up on my house cleaning, laundry, report writing, and crafts, so I will stop trying. The Brain and I share socks and t shirts... I'll just start getting more non gender specific clothing and say the hell with it. It'll be easier.

Have a great weekend!

3 Comments:

Blogger anne said...

I like the sharing clothing idea...that sounds pretty handy. My hubby is nowhere near my size, so that doesn't work for me.

And I also have a hard time listening to women only ever talk about their kids...I'm very lucky with the girls I know!

8:40 AM  
Blogger Andria said...

Hey KDubs, I'm with you! Maybe that's what I was doing wrong. Every so often I have this wierd desire to fit in with the other soccer moms. It usually only takes me a lunch to remember why I don't care if I fit in or not! Honestly, does it matter that Jimmy walked at 9 months and Johnny did it at 12? I think not!

Anyway, my real girlfriends and I usually grab a drink and swap the weeks horror stories... much more fun!

Also, anne, sharing clothes with your 9 year old is the definition of lazy but it works for me. At least that's what I tell myself. The poor kid will probably be on Oprah by the time he's 16!

9:11 AM  
Blogger Kristi said...

Sharing clothes with my kids for less laundry. That is another reason to diet. Thanks.

7:45 PM  

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