Big Changes
It has begun...
To say that this last week has brought change would be an understatement. The drama in my life has come to a complete and total stop, the abruptness of it leaving me gasping but strangely sated.
In the last week conversations with Agent C have changed. Words that used to scare the hell out of me but that now seem to have lost their venom have begun surfacing in our conversations. Words like marriage and love and children. Words that I never thought I could bring myself to consider again but that now seem necessary to me in some way.
He has started the ball rolling and will be moving here in August. He has decided that a career change is in order, and in what I consider to be a very brave move has decided to return to school and study law. He will begin law school in the Fall. He wants a job that can guarantee his making it home every night... it seems he feels that there's incentive for that now.
He's right. Yesterday was my last day at my job. I finally got to the point where the cost of The Job far outweighed any benefits of it. So today, for the first time in literally four and a half years I actually have a full day off. I'm terrified that I'm flying without a net in a job market that is far from friendly, but when I turned over my badge yesterday the only feelings tha I could muster were that of relief and joy. It's because of that that I know I made the right decision.
Like I said... big changes.
For the first time in so long that I can't even remember, I'm excited about the future. Excited to see what happens next... it's been a long time coming.
To say that this last week has brought change would be an understatement. The drama in my life has come to a complete and total stop, the abruptness of it leaving me gasping but strangely sated.
In the last week conversations with Agent C have changed. Words that used to scare the hell out of me but that now seem to have lost their venom have begun surfacing in our conversations. Words like marriage and love and children. Words that I never thought I could bring myself to consider again but that now seem necessary to me in some way.
He has started the ball rolling and will be moving here in August. He has decided that a career change is in order, and in what I consider to be a very brave move has decided to return to school and study law. He will begin law school in the Fall. He wants a job that can guarantee his making it home every night... it seems he feels that there's incentive for that now.
He's right. Yesterday was my last day at my job. I finally got to the point where the cost of The Job far outweighed any benefits of it. So today, for the first time in literally four and a half years I actually have a full day off. I'm terrified that I'm flying without a net in a job market that is far from friendly, but when I turned over my badge yesterday the only feelings tha I could muster were that of relief and joy. It's because of that that I know I made the right decision.
Like I said... big changes.
For the first time in so long that I can't even remember, I'm excited about the future. Excited to see what happens next... it's been a long time coming.